#NeverAssad – Still Crackpot, Still On Crack

Powerline otherwise serves a useful role as a pro-Trump & mainstream Republican outlet.

It is because I view Powerline as an ally on the pro-Trump branch of the right – on which branch this Hamiltonian bird is comfortably perched not least because Trump is governing, to the extent possible, as a Hamiltonian – that I must point out they are smoking crack. In Paul Mirengoff’s case the crack in the crack pipe is the always elusive creature of Muslim Democracy, forever promised – “we swear it’s in the mail!” –  by the various species of late-Wilsonian foreign policy hacks and forever never appearing in the mailbox.

For Hamiltonians searching for it is clearly worse than searching for the Yeti, Bigfoot, or Nessie.

Worse because, by now, the chances of at long last capturing any of the latter three organisms in a net are many times greater than finding a stable Islamic Democracy anywhere, and, also, worse because searching for those much-beloved icons of cryptozoology never results in Al-Qaeda and ISIS gnawing at the bloody remains of a once stable, if odd, Islamic Dictatorship as seen in post-Ghadaffi, “pro-Democracy” Libya.

One man, one vote, one orange jumpsuit, one ISIS snuff video of each voter in every pot.

I want neither friends nor allies smoking crack. Therefore, I tell them they are on crack when I see them on crack so they may put away the crack pipe, for whomever smoketh the crack pipe of Islamic Democracy shall surely be powdered themselves and smoked in the crack pipe by Daesh.

Hamiltonian foreign policy realism has an excellent detox program to handle such terrible conditions.

But, like all addictions, a cure for addiction to Wilsonian crack is not always possible.

But even when our program falls short it still accomplishes something worthwhile: good advice for those of you on the fence.  You see, many of you boys may not be Wilsonian crack addicts yet.

But you are tempted to try crack because your horny supermodel girlfriend is naked on your bed cooing for you to snort a line of Princeton’s finest Wilsonian crack off her perfect ass.

Our program’s advice to you: Ignore the crack, even if she wiggles seductively and calls you “Woodrow”, but screw the girl.  Woodrow did snort, caused a fiasco and was followed by FDR who, not satisfied with mere crack, went on a bath salt fueled rampage.

But enough foreplay.

Let’s get to the main topic.

Mirengoff takes Trump to task for cancelling CIA support to anti-Assad Syrian rebels.

Where to begin when there are so many errors to choose from?

My choice are his assumptions about the CIA.

Since when is the CIA a credible source for what rebel groups to arm and which to not arm? Especially when the just cancelled list of “Democratic-Moderate” rebels in question is a legacy draft typed up by the Obama-era CIA.

ISIS was once one of the “good” anti-Assad rebels. There were also “good” anti-Ghadaffi rebels in Syria.

If there are “moderate” anti-Assad rebels anywhere in the actual warzone, my long (and continuing……..) research into the health of Progressive USG tells me the CIA would be the least likely of any intel agency to identify them.

Given Obama’s penchant for supporting Islamic terrorists against America-friendly Islamic autocrats from Ghadaffi to Mubarak, the working assumption should be all of these anti-Assad rebels are genocidal Muslim terrorist outfits; that Obama and the CIA was fully aware they were genocidal Muslim terrorists; and that Obama for the sake of deliberately supporting genocidal Muslim terrorism forked over American tax dollars to them faster than he airlifted $400 million in cash (AKA harder-to-trace-than-electronic-money-transfers) worth of Swiss francs to Iran.

The only true moderates are Westernized, tax payer funded (naturally!) Muslim pundits nursing Starbucks lattes at American and Western European greenrooms waiting to add their talking head to yet another news channel panel. And even in their cases, I would assume there are some Jihadist sympathies bouncing around in the recesses of their empty talking heads.

Whatever intelligence gathering tools the CIA may have are overwhelmingly directed towards investigating the 2013 Miss Universe pageant in Moscow at the request of Robert Mueller’s circus show nicknamed “investigation”. A beauty pageant “investigation” also coming at tax payer expense.

You can’t trust any of the pompous “investigative” agencies these days to not piss money down the drain.

But Mirengoff would have me take the word of Brennan, Mueller, Comey and crew that those anti-Assad rebels they are throwing good money and good guns at are certified, Westernized, tolerant moderates never before seen in any Democratic Arab Revolution?

Never fear! Muslim moderates are in the mail and always will be!

Cash!

Check!

Bounce!

This bounced check brings me to the moderate Muslims themselves.

Once again, there are either no Muslim moderates to support in Syria (and a good chance those identified as “moderate” by a hapless FBI, Special Counsel, and CIA clumsily, gruntingly, hungrily fingering Miss Universe’s waxed bikini line for the articles of impeachment are really Muslim terrorists), or, those who do exist are so limited in number they will be quickly pushed aside by Islamic warlords the moment Assad loses power.

Our options in Syria are therefore:

  1. Assad wins.
  2. Assad falls and is replaced by an Arabian MadMax arena of Islamic warlords who go on to use their CIA-provided weapons and suitcases of Swiss francs to spread more “Democracy” in London, Paris, San Bernardino, and Brussels.
  3. Assad falls and is replaced by the first stable, gay pride march supporting, prosperous, environmentally friendly, secular Democracy in the Arab world governed by Westernized moderate Muslims.

Option #3 is crossed off because it there is no possibility of a moderate Muslim government emerging in post-Assad Syria anymore than there was in post-Ghadaffi Libya.

If the only choices are Assad and Islamic warlordism, Assad suddenly looks as attractive an option as Miss Universe for a number of reasons.

One of them is that a victorious Assad would be in no position to threaten his neighbors for many years to come.  His conventional military is shattered, propped up only by mercenaries and Russia’s expeditionary forces.

The fact Russia’s best option is, like America’s best option, to preserve Assad simply means that American and Russian interests in Syria overlap as that buffoon, Trump, always said they were.

Whatever threat an Assad government might pose to America and our regional allies would be easily containable through a mix of deterrence, sanctions, and occasional, limited, military action that does not seek to overthrow Assad.  Examples of the latter being America’s limited missile strike against a Syrian airfield following Assad’s use of sarin gas, Israel’s various counter attacks against Assad backed Hezbollah fighters and Israel’s rumored airstrike against a primitive Syrian nuclear program.

What terrorists were left operating in a Syria unified again under Assad’s power would be kept on a tight leash by an autocrat who would have a right to demand that they operate within his rules (or else).

The advantage here is that a centralized, terrorist friendly, government is easier to spy on and easier to pressure into pulling his terrorists choke chain if they get out of line.  Or, at least, easier for the Mossad to spy on since our “intelligence agents” have beauty pageants to subpoena.   I’m certain Mossad will pass on to Trump the information about Syria they gather that the CIA-NSA-XYZ should have gathered.

By contrast, post-Assad Syria would be the example par excellence of the downsides of terrorist decentralization; an intelligence black box inscrutable even if Mueller, Brennan, and Comey for once focused on terrorism and took their fingers out of Miss Universe’s hairless tight box.

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2 thoughts on “#NeverAssad – Still Crackpot, Still On Crack”

  1. TUJ, you are impressive. Keep up the good work and thanks for holding the line for those of us in Flyover Country.

    Like

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